Almost Here

Elizabeth stood out on their balcony, a far away look marring her features. Her nightgown hung loosely around her body, the ends blowing slightly in the wind. A single tear slowly escaped her eye, that was red and puffy from crying, and dripped down her cheek, cascading into a pile of nothing. She suddenly grew weak and leaned onto the wood railings for support, more tears flowing freely now as she stared out to the crystal clear ocean, bathed in moonlight. The sea…why does it have to be so cruel? She mentally asked herself as anger flowed through her veins at the mere smell of it. I’m losing you because of the sea…

Will Turner had been gone a month, again, but it felt like eternity for Elizabeth. He always went out on the ocean with Jack, his need for adventure and thrills far too strong to stay in one place for too long. But she needed her husband to come home, for good. She needed to know whether he still loved her, whether he was living a life of deceit, or if there was a small chance he still considered her his wife…Elizabeth toyed with the golden band wrapped around her finger, a symbol of eternal love. She slowly, painfully, took it off and put it on the railing, gazing at it briefly before lifting it up and squinting at the inscription. She didn’t need sight to know what it said. You are my strength and my love. He had said it himself, on their wedding day. Remembrances of that special day made her choke back a sob.

Did I hear you right
'Cause I thought you said
Let's think it over

You have been my life
And I never planned
Growing old without you…

Elizabeth was startled out of her reverie by footsteps in the garden, then of a door opening and closing. With a frightful glance she wiped back the remnants of her pain and stepped back inside, the cold air leaving her behind. She shut the balcony doors and stared at herself in the mirror. Broken…faded…weary…not me, at all.

She didn’t have time to take another step towards the door before it slowly creaked open, revealing the man whom she thought was her husband, once, but now she wasn’t too sure.

“Elizabeth…I, I’m back…” He walked towards her with outstretched arms, but she turned and focused her attention out the window.

Confused, he moved to touch her arm, but she abruptly pulled back and stared at him in the eyes, anger and pain boring into her soul at the mere sight of him, that...that…pirate.

He pulled back, hurt and lost, but knowing why she was acting so cold. Lord, I’ve pained her so much! I’m losing her!

Shadows bleeding through the light
Where a love once shined so bright
Came without a reason

Don't let go on us tonight
Love's not always black and white
Haven't I always loved you?

“Elizabeth, please, I’m so sorry I’ve been gone so long. Please, forgive me! I’m so sorry…” He muttered senselessly to her, blinking back tears that threatened to fall.

Elizabeth looked away, a few tears escaping, her cheeks hot and burning, her features contorting into a wry smile. She recited something she wrote on one of the long nights she lay in bed, without him next to her.

But when I need you
You're almost here
And I know that's
Not enough
But when I'm with you
I'm close to tears
'Cause you're only almost here…

Will’s heart broke as he listened to her indignant cry through literature. His sweet angel, his everything, was slowly slipping away…he needed to fix things, somehow, he would do anything to get things back to the way they were, before he had a thirst for sailing and pirating with Jack.

I would change the world
If I had a chance
Oh won't you let me

Treat me like a child
Throw your arms around me
Oh please protect me

“Please…” He begged her, as he looked at her with desperate eyes.

“I don’t know if we can recover Will...” she gritted her teeth, “you leave me each time to have your way with the world, steal and pillage, and god rest your soul, kill even.” She shrugged, she just didn’t know anymore.

“You leave me here, to face my father, to face the town. They know I’m the wife of a pirate, Will, they know that. Sometimes I don’t want to believe it. I convince myself each time you leave, you’re going to return. But what happens one day if you don’t? Don’t you dare say please to me Will, I’ve said please so many times to you I’ve lost count. But does that matter? No…you still run away to sail the seven seas.” The last few sentences were direct anger at him.

Will stood there, stunned, unable to comprehend the things he just heard. He had put her through so much suffering…but he loved her very much. Damn your soul, William Turner!

Bruised and battered by your words
Dazed and shattered now it hurts
Haven't I always loved you/

There, she had let it all out; let him know how she felt. It relaxed her slightly, made her feel more at ease, but it was far from over. She just could not throw away her marriage, just like that. Even though she felt sufficiently good when she pierced his soul with her words, she knew in her heart she never wanted to let this man go. She loved him too much to succumb to any of that. She just shook her head, and recited her poem once again, quietly and more to herself than anything.

But when I need you
You're almost here
And I know that's
Not enough
But when I'm with you
I'm close to tears
'Cause you're only almost here

“William Turner, sit with me. Let me hold you before you slip away again.” She slid down on the bed and he did the same, taking her hands and massaging her palms like he always did, the feeling stirring up more tears within the shaken woman.

She grasped the collar of his shirt, slowly running fingers over his neck and shoulder, noticing slight scars in some places, a particularly nasty one on his chin. She cupped his cheek as a tear dripped down hers, then buried her face in his neck, her arms wrapping about his shoulders, holding him tightly. Will whispered words of love in her hair, words of apology and of comfort. Elizabeth groaned as she realised how sorry he was. She couldn’t bear to hear anymore.

Bruised and battered by your words
Dazed and shattered now it hurts
Haven't I always loved you?

Will decided enough was enough; he couldn’t leave her again for petty crime. As much as he would miss riding the endless waves on the Pearl with Jack, he would have to be a husband first, and a pirate second. But that was all right, he loved her.

Elizabeth needed to be sure; she needed to trust him again. She looked up at the man she married and saw nothing but sincerity in his eyes.

“But when I need you, you're almost here,” She whispered.

“ Well I never knew how far behind I'd left you,” Will kissed her forehead and her cheeks, tasting her tears.

“ And when I hold you, you're almost here, ” Elizabeth felt herself grasp him tighter.

“ Well I'm sorry that I took our love for granted,” He kissed her lips softly, feeling her respond eagerly and fervently.

Now I'm with you, I'm close to tears
'Cause I know I'm almost here…
Only almost here…

FIN